I assume you've been completely devastated by my blog absence. I have been writing, but mostly lesson plans and things for my classroom seeing as the school year is now underway. It was a great summer and honestly, I was in no way ready to return. That said, the year is off to a great start and my students are delightful humans.
I am also so tired I can't handle it.
A thing I will literally never be ready for are people's comments on teaching and teachers. I have occasionally expressed how challenging it is to go back to work and people make snide comments like, "Well, I've never had three months off, so..."
LOOK. LISTEN. Until you have taught for one week, please don't comment. I know it seems like a lot of time to be off. But teaching is exhausted. I don't get paid for those three months if you look at it as a daily rate. Also, by the end of the school year, my brain hurts from managing feelings and hormones and lessons and grading. I can't pee when I want to. I am never "done" with work, not ever. Emotionally, teaching is challenging and rewarding and incredible, but also so draining it's kind of unreal.
I am not saying I'm ungrateful for my schedule. What I am NOT grateful for is people who feel the need to comment with zero understanding of how challenging teaching is.
I am nearly done with my Master's degree and I have the most horrific "senoiritis" ever. I don't want to write. I don't want to post discussions. I don't want to make videos. My last class was on budgeting and it gave me such incredible anxiety. I have struggled with math since decimals in 5th grade and having to do it with huge figures, combined with a general lack of motivation, did not make it great.
It is strange, however, to think that it is unlikely I will ever attend school again. While I used to say that my first child would be named "PhD" (yes, I recognize I am a douche), the idea of doing more school now makes me want to die inside. I have loved school since I was a kid (OBVIOUSLY, I AM A TEACHER) but I just don't have it in me anymore.
When I finish in December, I am going to sleep for a week and consume a rude amount of champagne.
Am I the only one still riding the high from the eclipse this week? I thought it was magical. I love space, and have loved it since I was a little girl. A little-known fact about me is that I once wanted to be an astronaut. My dad stoked my love of science in general and space specifically by subscribing me to 3,2,1 Contact! magazine and taking me outside to make a pinhole camera during an eclipse. Sadly, I hate math and barf and am only 5" tall so being an astronaut wasn't in my future.
That said, I loved the eclipse. Not only did it look incredible, but I loved seeing so many people united around something positive and cool and that can't help but fill you with wonder. There was something so universal and beautiful about it that made me feel all choked up inside.
If you want to see some truly lovely pics from the eclipse, this article from the New Yorker is just lovely.
More stupid things that have happened while I've walked my dog:
1. One woman letting her teensy chihuahua off leash and getting frustrated when Hank was chasing it (on leash) and telling me to control my dog. Ummm...?
2. One family leaving their gate open and allowing their dog to follow me half a block before it got aggressive with Hank. I walked back towards their house, got their dog in the gate, and shut the gate. The homeowner came out and yelled at me for shutting their gate, even after I explained that their dog was out and getting aggressive with mine.
3. A man hollering out a huge van about how attractive he finds me and then nearly turning the wrong way down a one-way street when I chose not to acknowledge him so he could let me know how distasteful he found me. Charming.
I stopped to get a coffee at Dutch Bros this week. I generally find the whole Dutch Bros situation to be a BIT much. I don't particularly enjoy talking about nothing, particularly with strangers, especially before 8 AM. But I do love their coffee and I wanted a mocha and so I went.
A hyped up 20-year-old gentleman was taking orders and as per their normal routine, basically invited himself into my vehicle. As he was taking my order, he stood back and I realized that his zipper was down. I started trying to tell him but he was yammering on about college and life and other ridiculousness. He asked a bunch of questions about my coffee and finally I said, "DUDE." And then I told him.
His reaction wasn't great -- he almost seemed perturbed that I had told him. I understand that it's embarrassing. I do. But seriously, aren't you GLAD? There was a lot poking out and I was happy to give him a tip (AHEM!) but he was so sensitive.
For the record, if we know one another in real life and you never tell me if I have green stuff in my teeth or a zipper that's down or a pulsing whitehead on my nose, I will question our friendship.